Comments on: #85: Ismael “Exxon” Valdez http://fireloupiniella.wordpress.com/2007/02/28/85-ismael-exxon-valdez/ Ushering in 101 years of suck. Mon, 07 Dec 2009 02:18:19 +0000 http://wordpress.com/ hourly 1 By: Bad Kermit http://fireloupiniella.wordpress.com/2007/02/28/85-ismael-exxon-valdez/#comment-663 Bad Kermit Fri, 02 Mar 2007 19:57:17 +0000 http://fireloupiniella.wordpress.com/2007/02/28/85-ismael-exxon-valdez/#comment-663 I fixed it for you, Slak. I fixed it for you, Slak.

]]> By: Mike D. http://fireloupiniella.wordpress.com/2007/02/28/85-ismael-exxon-valdez/#comment-619 Mike D. Thu, 01 Mar 2007 01:44:43 +0000 http://fireloupiniella.wordpress.com/2007/02/28/85-ismael-exxon-valdez/#comment-619 What Slaky said. When I hear Ismael Valdez, my first thoughts are--seriously--"hands as soft as porcelan". I also happened to be at a game where he drove in the sole run in a 1-0 victory against Montreal. Because he was later stricken, after his RBI, with another debilitating case of blister outbreak and left before 5 innings, it was determined that he was the only starting pitcher--at least as far back as 1990--to have driven in the sole run in a game without sticking around for the "W". Because he had candy hands. So there's that. F@#$ing Ismael Valdez. What Slaky said.

When I hear Ismael Valdez, my first thoughts are–seriously–”hands as soft as porcelan”.

I also happened to be at a game where he drove in the sole run in a 1-0 victory against Montreal. Because he was later stricken, after his RBI, with another debilitating case of blister outbreak and left before 5 innings, it was determined that he was the only starting pitcher–at least as far back as 1990–to have driven in the sole run in a game without sticking around for the “W”.

Because he had candy hands.

So there’s that. F@#$ing Ismael Valdez.

]]> By: Slaky http://fireloupiniella.wordpress.com/2007/02/28/85-ismael-exxon-valdez/#comment-610 Slaky Wed, 28 Feb 2007 18:18:51 +0000 http://fireloupiniella.wordpress.com/2007/02/28/85-ismael-exxon-valdez/#comment-610 Also, since I wasn't posting here when you entered Jason Bere into Cubs' lore...fuck him and his FOSH. Loser. Also, since I wasn’t posting here when you entered Jason Bere into Cubs’ lore…fuck him and his FOSH. Loser.

]]> By: Slaky http://fireloupiniella.wordpress.com/2007/02/28/85-ismael-exxon-valdez/#comment-609 Slaky Wed, 28 Feb 2007 17:55:51 +0000 http://fireloupiniella.wordpress.com/2007/02/28/85-ismael-exxon-valdez/#comment-609 Hey look! Arne got a shot of Ish soaking his worthless butthole-fingering digits in some solution that's supposed to toughen up his skin. Hey look! Arne got a shot of Ish soaking his worthless butthole-fingering digits in some solution that’s supposed to toughen up his skin.

]]> By: Bad Kermit http://fireloupiniella.wordpress.com/2007/02/28/85-ismael-exxon-valdez/#comment-608 Bad Kermit Wed, 28 Feb 2007 17:14:29 +0000 http://fireloupiniella.wordpress.com/2007/02/28/85-ismael-exxon-valdez/#comment-608 I knew I could count on you to take care of it. That guy was a grade-A pansy. I knew I could count on you to take care of it. That guy was a grade-A pansy.

]]> By: Slaky http://fireloupiniella.wordpress.com/2007/02/28/85-ismael-exxon-valdez/#comment-607 Slaky Wed, 28 Feb 2007 17:02:06 +0000 http://fireloupiniella.wordpress.com/2007/02/28/85-ismael-exxon-valdez/#comment-607 How do you write about THIS FUCKING ASSHOLE without discussing his crab hands or whatever they called it? He had blisters EVERY FUCKING DAY. Caps drives the point home that I hated this piece of shit. Before he was a Cub, he was a Dodger and he completely dominated the Cubs every single time he faced them. Fuck this guy with a rusty can opener. How do you write about THIS FUCKING ASSHOLE without discussing his crab hands or whatever they called it? He had blisters EVERY FUCKING DAY. Caps drives the point home that I hated this piece of shit.

Before he was a Cub, he was a Dodger and he completely dominated the Cubs every single time he faced them.

Fuck this guy with a rusty can opener.

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