#91: Luis Ernesto Garcia Salazar del Base Tercero

A wise man once said to me, “I bet you could fill up your entire list with just third basemen.” Or something like that. I think I was drunk when I read it. But he had a point. There have been some not good players over at the hot corner since Ron Santo left, and Luis Salazar is one of them.

Salazar sprints like Rudy as he is summoned off the field.

Salazar charges toward his destiny. His destiny is to suck.

In late 1989, the Cubs acquired Salazar to replace the eighty third basemen they already had on the roster who also all sucked. Salazar actually performed well and helped spark the Cubs as they went on to win the NL East. Sounds like Gary Gaetti, doesn’t it? Now, imagine that Gaetti kept coming back. Because that’s what Salazar did the next year. And the year after that. And the year after that. And he got worse, and worse, and worse.

By the end, Salazar had to be replaced with Steve Buechele. If you’re ever replaced with Steve Buechele at anything you are currently doing, you know it’s time to retire, and that’s what Salazar did.

Low Point: Pay attention. He was replaced by Steve Buechele. Other than that, let’s look toward the end of Salazar’s career. September 26, 1992. The Cubs are mired in a five-game losing streak, they’re 17 games back, and they’re disinterestedly playing out the stretch. Salazar was even less interested than that. While the Cubs collect only 4 hits and get shut out by the Expos, Salazar goes 0-4 with 3 strikeouts and commits a throwing error in the field which leads to a gift Expo run.  Cubs lose 12-0.

Did You Know? Salazar is currently the hitting coach for the Jacksonville Suns, a AA Dodgers team. He taught them everything he knows, and then he took 364 days off.


11 Responses to “#91: Luis Ernesto Garcia Salazar del Base Tercero”

  1. 1 bocaj February 22, 2007 at 6:25 pm

    i think u forgot quotes in between his name buddy…

  2. 2 JD, Too February 22, 2007 at 6:30 pm


  3. 3 John February 22, 2007 at 6:56 pm

    ha ha I loved Luis. Everytime I’d watch the Cubs on TV, Carey would invariably butcher the crap out of his name

    (in the Carey voice) ” And here comes Loooeeee Halazlkj (coughs up a loogey) *ahem* Halazar, a career .286 hitter on Sundays. Boy you know, they play a lot of Sunday games, so thats pretty good”

    I miss Harry 😦

  4. 4 Gabor Paul Bako February 22, 2007 at 7:26 pm

    When will I come up on the list?

  5. 5 Bad Kermit February 23, 2007 at 12:26 am

    Oh, sweet Gabor. Don’t worry. I haven’t forgotten you.

    I’m going to have to do a “Who Did I Miss?” post at the end of all of this. So. Many. Awful. Cubs.

  6. 6 JD, Too February 23, 2007 at 8:52 am

    You’ve got a long ways to go.

  7. 7 Martin Brady February 23, 2007 at 3:22 pm

    Actually, Salazar had a 13-year career, had 1,070 hits with 455 RBIs and 117 stolen bases, played in a World Series with the Padres, and hit .368 for the Cubs in the 1989 NLCS, with a triple, a HR and a couple RBIs. He probably earned about $5M, too. You should have such a career.

  8. 9 JD, Too February 24, 2007 at 9:15 am

    Martin Brady—

    Salazar sucked. Get over it. No one’s saying that he wasn’t better than any of us. He’s probably over 50 right now and I’d say that he’s STILL better than me. We’re saying he wasn’t better than 95% of the players he was playing with and against.

    I bet he married a white woman, too.

  9. 10 Pre March 5, 2007 at 11:03 pm

    He was awesome at tomahawking at balls over his head.

  1. 1 #79: Marvell Wynne”? More Like Marvell Lose!” « Fire Lou Piniella! Trackback on March 6, 2007 at 9:53 am

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Older Posts

The Bottom 126 Cubs of My Lifetime

1. Todd Hundley

2. Neifi Perez

3. Alex Gonzalez

4. LaTroy Hawkins

5. Fred McGriff

6. Corey Patterson

7. Mel Rojas

8. Jeff Blauser

9. Antonio Alfonseca

10. Juan Pierre

11. Shawn Estes

12. Felix Heredia

13. Julian Tavarez

14. Kyle Farnsworth

15. Mark Prior

16. Kent Mercker

17. Moises Alou

18. Dave Veres

19. Jose Macias

20. Lenny Harris

21. Jose Hernandez

22. Jacque Jones

23. The Unnamed Pitchers of the 90s

24. Freddy Bynum

25. Jerry Hairston, Jr.

26. Scott Williamson

27. Tony Womack

28. Andy Pratt

29. Will Ohman

30. Phil Nevin

31. Jeff Fassero

32. Ronny Cedeno

33. Brant Brown

34. Roosevelt Brown

35. Jason Dubois

36. Wade Miller

37. Mark Guthrie

38. Sergio Mitre

39. Juan Cruz

40. Gabor Paul II Bako

41. Ryan Dempster

42. Mike Remlinger

43. Glendon Rusch

44. Nomar Garciaparra

45. Gary Matthews, Jr.

46. Matt Clement

47. Gary Gaetti

48. Bobby Hill

49. Benito Santiago

50. Jerome Williams

51. Roberto Novoa

52. David Kelton

53. Todd Wellemeyer

54. Shane Andrews

55. Darrin Jackson

56. Frank DiPino/Terry Francona

57. John Mabry

58. Curtis Wilkerson

59. Hee Seop Choi

60. Cesar Izturis

61. Rick Wilkins

62. Jon Garland

63. Augie Ojeda

64. Jerome Walton

65. Jae Kuk Ryu

66. Todd Hollandsworth

67. Karl "Tuffy" Rhodes

68. Willie Greene

69. Michael Tucker

70. Damon Berryhill

71. Jon Leicester

72. Mitch Webster

73. Curtis/Tom Goodwin

74. Jody Gerut

75. Jim Sundberg

76. Steve Buechele

77. Darren Lewis

78. Rey Ordonez

79. Marvell Wynne

80. Tyler Houston

81. Amaury Telemaco

82. Kevin Roberson

83. Damian Jackson

84. Doug Dascenzo

85. Ismael Valdez

86. Matt Karchner

87. Jeff Huson

88. Jose Nieves

89. Ross Gload

90. Chad Hermansen

91. Luis Salazar

92. Mike Hubbard

93. Delino DeShields

94. Matt Lawton

95. Howard Johnson

96. Rondell White

97. Turk Wendell

98. Ray King

99. Gary Scott

100. Steve Rain

101. Kevin Orie

102. Rey Sanchez

103. Francis Beltran

104. Paul Noce

105. Enrique Wilson

106. Ruben Quevedo

107. Damon Buford

108. Brooks Kieschnick

109. Damian Miller

110. Scott Bullett

111. Rick Aguilera

112. Chad Meyers

113. Gary Varsho

114. Jason Bere

115. Troy O'Leary

116. Chico Walker

117. Rick Wrona

118. Leo Gomez

119. Chris Stynes

120. Dan Plesac

121. Robert Machado

122. Julio Zuleta

123. Todd Zeile

124. Chad Fox

125. Adam Greenberg

126. Sandy Martinez

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