#82: Kevin “Highway” Roberson

Not even the guy who actually pays money to sponsor Kevin Roberson’s Baseball Reference page can say anything good about him. On his page, it says, “This guy seemed really good when I was nine. Ah, the follies of youth.” Seriously, go look. And while you’re over there, check out how putrid Roberson’s numbers are. When you’re done dry-heaving, come on back. I’ll wait.

Running or rolling?  You decide.

Roberson sprints off the field after warming up the right fielder.

From the Rob Deer school of hitting, Roberson certainly didn’t get cheated out of his swings. Many bleacher fans on many hot days were pleasantly cooled by Roberson’s wild flailings at the plate. Roberson must have skipped the part of Deer’s course that taught prodigious power, though. Oh, and the part where you actually have to play defense, too.

But, Roberson was good enough to make the Cubs’ roster from 1993-1995, roaming the outfield, swinging like an wild man, and raising the ire of Cubs fans everywhere.

Low Point: One tenet of the Rob Deer school of hitting is that one must actually be willing to take a walk. Roberson wouldn’t, at one point going a month and a half (27 games and 37 at-bats) between walks.

Did You Know? Roberson is from Decatur, Illinois, not far from the home base of Fire Lou Piniella! If I suddenly disappear, you know who did it, and I expect you to avenge me.

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13 Responses to “#82: Kevin “Highway” Roberson”


  1. 1 Harry Caray March 3, 2007 at 2:37 pm

    They’re dancing in the streets of Decatur!

  2. 2 RockTheIvy March 3, 2007 at 5:00 pm

    Former home of the Decatur Staleys!

  3. 3 Slaky March 3, 2007 at 6:30 pm

    You think you can get through the rest of these losers before Opening Day? Uncky Lou is going to have a lot bitchin’ to do come Ape One.

  4. 4 CT March 3, 2007 at 8:22 pm

    I thought your home base was in Naperville. That’s no where near Shit City, uh, Decatur.

  5. 5 bocaj March 4, 2007 at 9:34 am

    hey kermie, i want to see a pre-season prediction blog, with all the divisions and world series champs, from u…and lou should do one too

  6. 6 al March 4, 2007 at 9:47 am

    on the second page of todays tribune in the double take part it mentions that there is another site for fire lou piniella.. how angry were you to see that this site wasnt mentioned

  7. 7 Bad Kermit March 4, 2007 at 11:15 am

    Really? Which section? I didn’t see it in sports or in the front section. Nice reporting by the Trib. The other two “FLP”s haven’t been updated since November.

  8. 8 Bad Kermit March 4, 2007 at 11:22 am

    Never mind. I found it. They say the other site is “compiling a list of reasons he should be fired,” which they haven’t done since Trammell was hired. Eff the Tribune.

  9. 9 al March 4, 2007 at 11:51 am

    even if those sites were updated this one is the best…and most entertaining..good thing i spotted that

  10. 10 Slaky March 4, 2007 at 11:52 am

    Seems that most morans that happent to stumble on the real FLP don’t get it anyway. The Trib, had it found this site, would have written something like:

    “There’s a website dedicated to the Firing of Lou Piniella before a regular season game has even been played, proving that Cubs fans are an angrier bunch since 2003.”

  11. 11 Bad Kermit March 4, 2007 at 11:56 am

    Good point, Slak. And thanks for catching that, Al. I e-mailed them and said that a simple Google search would have shown them the more popular site. Wah wah wah. I’m going to shut up about it now.

  12. 12 CT March 4, 2007 at 1:14 pm

    That’s what I like best about this site, that people take it seriously.

    Keep bitching Kerm, it’s the only way you’ll get from fringe blog to underground sensation.

  13. 13 JD, Too March 4, 2007 at 11:34 pm

    I’ve got an underground sensation in my pants.

    Get it?

    I said in my PANTS!


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